Our Son Likes Wearing Tutus – Is That a Problem?
Our son likes wearing tutus, and if you don't like it that's your problem...not ours.
Is that harsh? Maybe. Do I care? Not even a little bit.
We enrolled our kids in ballet together because they said they wanted to be in the same class. A nice perk of that is it made our lives a little bit easier because it meant we didn't have take them to different classes at different times.
It's a class of 10-15 kids ages 2-5 with a handful of boys, and our son is the only one who wears a ballerina skirt.
Maybe the other boys in the class don't want to wear tutus and maybe their parents don't let them...I don't know and I don't really care, it's none of our business!
This blog post isn't unique and it probably doesn't offer any further insight into why we as parents think it's important for kids to express themselves but I still wanted to write it because it's important to me as a parent and maybe one day it will be important to our son.
A few weeks ago my wife posted this after taking our 3 yr old son shopping...
Me to my son: If you want me to buy you a skirt, please pick one in a color you don't already have.
Awesome. That's just another of the long list of reasons why I married the right girl and our kids have a super cool mama!
If our son wants to wear hair clips, he gets to wear hair clips. If he wants to wear his favorite Queen Elsa or bride's dress, he gets to wear them. He gets to wear any of the pretty dresses his big sister will let him wear (she has favorites she isn't ready to share yet).
And you might be surprised at the number of glares or comments we get from other adults.
Like the time my wife and kids were at a restaurant and one elderly man said to our son who was wearing a pretty skirt...'Son, are you a boy or a girl?'
My wife wasn't in the mood to respond that day, but my first thought when she told me about it was why did it matter to him? My second thought was being elderly isn't a good excuse for being rude to our kids.
Our son will ask to wear a dress or skirt and when he puts it on he asks if he looks beautiful? Yes, son...you look absolutely gorgeous!
A couple weeks ago we were at McDonald's before ballet class and the kids got changed into their ballerina skirts in the bathroom. When they came back into the play area a Dad about my age was sitting with his son in the corner. The Dad didn't say anything but he didn't have to because his facial expression said enough.
Sorry fellow Dad at McDonald's...if you don't like our son wearing a tutu, that's your problem...not ours.
We as parents are trying to do everything we can to make our kids happy and well adjusted. Happy is the key word in that sentence. Pretty much every decision we make is to keep both of our kids happy. It's as simple as that!
We're not considering things like the perception of other adults or kids, or whether or not him wearing a dress at age 3 will mean he'll be wanting to wear dresses when he's a teen. But I will say this...if our son gets glares and comments at age 3, I can only imagine what it would be like for him at age 13.
But whatever it may look like 10 years down the road, he'll still have two parents who will always love and support him and will never stop reminding him that if other people don't like him wearing skirts...that's their problem, not ours.